As someone with abusive immediate family, I have made the compromise of only addressing my Pagan Dead in prayer so far, those ancestors who are far enough back that it doesn’t matter … Yet, I have an interest in genealogy, and I have a pull to one particular great-grandfather, who I never met in life but whose influence nevertheless impacted my youth. I am wrestling with that draw, but I may one day go there. I am not ready yet, but I think I will be one day.
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Senneferet asked me a really potent question in the comments section of one of my ancestor posts: “How do you cope when finding out bad information about someone you had previously loved and respected? I know everyone has their flaws, but I feel a bit foolish. (I adored my grandfather and assumed he had a deep love for my grandmother. I recently found out how violent and cruel he was to her and their children. His photo has been relegated to a drawer in my shrine room for the time being.)”
This is such a good question, and I’ll bet that an awful lot of people are in this situation and don’t know what to do. I certainly know that for myself, it was so much, exactly like this, that tripped me up in learning to honor my ancestors when I started out. That’s why I…
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Temple of Athena the Savior 
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